The salary counter-offer email — 4 templates women actually send (with line-by-line notes)

There is a tightrope every woman walks when she negotiates by email.

Too assertive and you trigger the backlash that research has documented for decades — the one where the same directness that reads as confidence in a man reads as difficult in a woman. Too soft and you signal that you will accept less. Too long and you over-explain yourself out of money. Too short and you seem unprepared.

Generic email templates were not written with this tightrope in mind. They were written for a default negotiator who doesn't face it.

These four templates were. Each one is built for a specific scenario, with notes on why particular phrases were chosen and what they are designed to do.

Before you write anything

Two things to know before you open a blank email:

Name one number, not a range. "I was hoping for something between £55,000 and £65,000" is an instruction to offer £55,000. A range is not a negotiation — it is a ceiling-and-floor from which they will choose the floor. State one number: the one you actually want.

Ground it in market data, not personal need. "I need more because my rent has gone up" is not a negotiating position. "Based on market data for this role at this level" is. External data depersonalises the ask. It makes your number a fact of the market rather than a request for a favour.

Template 1 — The standard counter on a new job offer

When to use this: You've received an offer, the number is below your target, and you want to counter by email after taking time to think.

“Subject: Re: [Your name] — Offer for [Role title] Hi [Name], Thank you so much for the offer — I'm genuinely excited about the role and the team, and I'm glad we've reached this point. I've had the chance to review everything carefully. I'd like to discuss the base salary before I confirm. Based on my research into market rates for this role at this level in [city/sector], and considering my experience in [one specific area], I was targeting [your number]. Is there flexibility to get there? I'm very keen to make this work and I look forward to your response. [Your name]”

Line by line

"Thank you so much for the offer" — Warmth first. This is not weakness. It signals that you want the role, which matters, and it sets a collaborative tone that research shows reduces backlash risk for women.

"I'm genuinely excited about the role and the team" — Specific enthusiasm. "Genuinely" is intentional — it reads as considered rather than performative. Naming the team, not just the role, shows you've been paying attention.

"I've had the chance to review everything carefully" — This frames your counter as a considered response, not a knee-jerk reaction. It implies you could have come back sooner but chose to be thorough. It positions you as measured.

"I'd like to discuss the base salary before I confirm" — "Before I confirm" is load-bearing. It signals that your acceptance is conditional on this conversation — without making it sound like an ultimatum. You are not withdrawing. You are pausing.

"Based on my research into market rates" — The most important phrase in the email. Your number is grounded in data, not desire. This removes the personal dimension and makes it a professional exchange rather than an interpersonal one.

"I was targeting [your number]" — "Targeting" rather than "expecting" or "needing." It implies precision without entitlement. It is a word that belongs in professional conversations.

"Is there flexibility to get there?" — A direct question that requires a direct answer. Not "I hope we can..." or "If possible..." — a question. It moves the conversation forward.

"I'm very keen to make this work" — Closes collaboratively. This sentence exists to neutralise any residual tension from the counter. It says: I want a yes. Help me find one.

Template 2 — The large gap counter

When to use this: The offer is significantly below your target — 15% or more. You need to push hard without reading as aggressive.

“Subject: Re: [Your name] — Offer for [Role title] Hi [Name], Thank you for the offer — I've been looking forward to this stage and I appreciate the time the team has invested. I want to be straightforward with you: the base salary is lower than I was expecting based on my research. Looking at current market data for [role title] at this level in [city/sector] — across [Glassdoor / LinkedIn Salary / industry reports] — I'm seeing a range of [market range], and I was targeting [your number]. I'm genuinely committed to this role, and I'd like to find a way to make this work. Is there room to move the base salary closer to [your number]? If the base has constraints, I'm also open to a conversation about a signing bonus or an early performance review. I appreciate you looking into it and I look forward to hearing from you. [Your name]”

Line by line

"I want to be straightforward with you" — This phrase does significant work. It signals directness while framing it as a relational choice — you are being transparent with them, not confronting them. It disarms.

"The base salary is lower than I was expecting based on my research" — Name the problem plainly and immediately. Do not bury it in qualifications. The phrase "based on my research" keeps it external and factual.

"Looking at current market data... I'm seeing a range of [market range]" — Cite your sources. This is the difference between an opinion and a position. Naming Glassdoor or LinkedIn Salary makes the data checkable and signals you have done real preparation.

"I was targeting [your number]" — Still one number. Even when the gap is large. Especially when the gap is large.

"I'm genuinely committed to this role" — The word "genuinely" matters here because the size of the counter could read as disinterest. This sentence exists to correct that misread.

"Is there room to move the base salary closer to [your number]?" — "Closer to" rather than "to reach exactly" — this gives them a path that doesn't require meeting your number completely while still signalling where you want to land.

"If the base has constraints, I'm also open to a conversation about..." — Opening a second door before they close the first. This is strategic, not a concession. You are showing flexibility on form while holding firm on value.

Template 3 — When they say the salary is fixed

When to use this: They have said the base salary cannot move. You are not done negotiating — you are shifting the conversation.

“Subject: Re: [Your name] — Offer for [Role title] Hi [Name], Thank you for looking into it — I appreciate you being direct about the constraints. I'd like to keep the conversation going, if that's okay. If the base salary has a firm ceiling, I'd love to explore what flexibility exists elsewhere in the package. Specifically, I'd be interested in discussing: — A signing bonus to bridge some of the gap — An early performance review at six months, with a clear commitment to revisit the base salary — [Additional holiday / remote flexibility / training budget] if there is room there I'm committed to joining and I want to reach a yes. Which of these feels most workable from your side? [Your name]”

Line by line

"Thank you for looking into it — I appreciate you being direct about the constraints" — Acknowledge their response without accepting it as the end of the negotiation. You are thanking them for the information, not for the answer.

"I'd like to keep the conversation going, if that's okay" — The quietest possible assertion that the conversation is not over. "If that's okay" softens it without withdrawing it. You are asking permission to continue, which paradoxically makes you harder to refuse.

"If the base salary has a firm ceiling" — Note the "if." You are not accepting that it is firm. You are operating on the hypothetical that it might be, while leaving space for it not to be.

Bullet list of alternatives — The list format does two things: it shows you have prepared (you know what you want), and it gives them something concrete to say yes to. An open-ended "what can you do?" is harder to act on than a list.

"Which of these feels most workable from your side?" — Turns the question back to them. You are not accepting a no — you are asking them to find a yes. "Feels most workable" is collaborative language; it invites them to solve the problem with you.

Template 4 — Following up after silence

When to use this: You sent your counter 3–5 business days ago. You have heard nothing. This is your one follow-up.

“Subject: Following up — [Your name] / [Role title] Hi [Name], I wanted to follow up on my email from [date] regarding the base salary. I remain very interested in the role and I'm hoping we can find a way forward. Please let me know if you need any additional information from me, or if there's a good time to speak. [Your name]”

Line by line

"I wanted to follow up on my email from [date]" — Reference the specific date. This is professional precision, not passive aggression. It also makes it easy for them to find the original email.

"I remain very interested in the role" — The most important sentence in this email. Silence after a counter can be misread as either withdrawal or resentment. This corrects both.

"I'm hoping we can find a way forward" — Neutral and forward-looking. Not "I'm still waiting for an answer" — that creates pressure. "Find a way forward" invites action.

"Please let me know if you need any additional information from me" — An off-ramp. If they have been delayed because they are waiting to make a case internally, this opens a door for them. You are offering to help them say yes.

Keep it short. This email works because it is four sentences. A longer follow-up implies anxiety. Brevity implies confidence.

What to do after you send

If they come back with a partial yes — a number between their original offer and yours — you have a choice. You can accept it, or you can do one more round: "That's closer — would you be able to get to [your number]?" One more ask is almost always available. Most people don't make it.

If they say no across the board — ask one final question before you decide: "I appreciate your honesty. Is there genuinely no flexibility anywhere in the package?" Then listen carefully to the answer. A company that cannot close a reasonable gap on a candidate they have chosen is telling you something about how they value their people.

If they come back with a yes — ask for the revised offer in writing before you sign anything. A verbal agreement to a new number is not a new number.